Life Rolls Along

Since my last visit here,

Jan has become a year older.
Friends gathered, love flows.

I gave birth to a kidney stone.
An ER visit to my old work place.

My son found an “official” girlfriend.
Met her parents and all that jazz.

I filed a civil suit against Carl Shrader.
I confess, I found the strength just yesterday.

I started a small writing job for a
life transitional coach. Hmmmmm odd that.

I struggle each day to believe in myself.
Most days I lose. I’m working on changing that.

Jan continues to provide more than bacon
unconditionally and with great love.

I prepared packets for Eulogy writing
two weeks ago. They are in a brief case
in my car. I am afraid.

I love Rosie on The View

I think more and more people are seeing the
truth of GWB and what he has done to us all.

I am sick of the hateful political commercials
on my television.

I have been waiting on my computer guy
for one month to fix my kids computers.
Jan’s was finally fixed two weeks ago.
He has been “coming back” since. I have
waited all day yesterday and today expecting
that he would honor the new appointment we had.
Jan is letting Kate and Hilary use her computer
because mine are filled with work stuff I cant lose.
Its time to just buy new ones and tell the computer
guy to fuck off. And give me the hundred dollars
you owe me for the stove you bought.

Jan wants to take me to dinner to celebrate my
finally filing papers on Carl. I deserve no award for
waiting. For being afraid.

The book came out. It looks just like the picture over there
on the left. We were shampooing carpets at the time.
The moment was lost. Later, we had friends over and they read
some of my tributes in it. I was a star for a little while.
It was nice. Since then, I took the time to really take that
moment in. My name as a writer in a book. I did do something
good. What I wrote touched the families I wrote about.
I wish for more of the same.

It is that feeling I want to regain, for them and for me.