Working, working

I have been going non-stop for weeks now it seems.
I don’t think I need a break from the art form but I
need to do something less detailed next.
Just something free and easy.

My eyes are giving me trouble and I cant wait for
Friday when I pick up my new glasses. Jan splurged
for me when I was in getting my exam and bought
clip on (but nice ones) sunglass attachments for my
glasses. I don’t like the tinting Jan prefers. It changes
true color which bothers me, not to mention the tint
never goes back to fully clear and so you look
like you are wearing sunglasses indoors. Especially in
pictures. Jan prefers that mostly because she had
Bells Palsy a while ago and one eye droops now. It is
unnoticeable to me and profound to her. As we are prone
to do to ourselves. She is beautiful with or without those
tinted glasses I loathe. Anyway, both Jan and I ended up
picking out very rectangular frames. We have always gone
with round, not too big on the face, but not too small either.

Mine are silver and not very girly. They are actually mens
frames, but they fit my large face well. My tri-focal progressive
prescription will not allow for too small of a frame. But I like the
shape very much.

The sales clerk was super kind and found me several discounts
which helped the cost. Jan and I are of course completely out
in these places, doctors, dentists, and have found people in
this small town to be so accepting of us. They actually offered to
put my glasses on Jan’s payroll deduction account as hers will be.
I said no, I would rather pay it up front and not have that added
amount come out of her check for the next three months.
But it was wonderful that they offered it and I thanked them for it.

It bothers me that so many assume the south is intolerant.
Yes we have our fair share of really down home people,
but for the most part they are kind and happy to meet us.
We don’t act like we expect to be attacked either. We smile and
converse from the get go. It seems a foreign concept to local
lesbians. Some people just act like they expect it. Walking around
angry at the world, expecting to be abused and so they are and
can be so damned proud of how smart they are. When I see other
lesbian couples out and about around here, they seem angry.
It’s called Gay bitches, try to be happy. LOL

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Kate was picked up from work by Jan today. I worked late last
night and have been nursing aching hips from my arthritis from
all this rain. I slept on the couch so my tossing and turning wouldn’t
keep da honey awake. I suspect she turned off her alarm and
went back to sleep, or never set it last night. So I woke her at 6:30,
she usually leaves at that time. Oops. I can count on one hand the
times that has happened. She picked Kate up on her way to work and
dropped her off here. At least she stole and hour of sleep for herself.
It was nice that I didn’t have to get out this morning too.
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Kate and I had a long talk about roles in this house.
Very interesting to hear her perspective.

I was the buyer of gifts, the one who guides, even with
Jan to a certain extent. Certainly when it comes to home
care and day to day maintenance. They all follow my lead.
In many more ways than household issues. But in trying to gently
and not so gently guide them out of this cozy nest, I pull away.
I stopped doing those things they should be doing for themselves.

Kate has become the head cheerleader of the house.
The one who has the ideas and implements them for gifts,
and occasions. And she resents it. For two years she has held
the role of making the other two come up with a plan and carrying
it out. I will say Hilary is much improved this year but John Paul is
horribly dependent still. Kate is overwhelmed at his immaturity.
Welcome to my world daughter, I am so sorry. I gave her the
advice I gave myself, just say no. Make yourself not handle it.
Let them make it or not.

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The children’s grandmother is in the hospital. Kate called her dad
last night and he told her she was having chest pains. She is at
Jan’s hospital now having a stress test. I have no problems with my
ex-mother in law. I feel sorry for her actually. She has given her life
to her family and adopted the loving nickname of Scag, for her trouble.
It is yelled in stores, “hey Scag, come here and look at this”.
No really…. why would you allow that? I cant even go there today.
I do wish her well and will say a prayer for her. Evelyn is her name.

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I’m taking the morning off of work to get this house in shape.
I have neglected it a bit. I am excited that tomorrow Jan is doing
another class and then we are all going to get together in the yard
to prune and finish mowing. I made the invitation to every child.
They actually have become much more open to it in the last
two years. Prior to that, it had to be forced on them. I love when
I get to prune back my flower beds and trees and tame the ivy on
the driveway rock wall. When the kids are here, I no longer have to
haul it all to the compost pile. I also need to do the spring cleaning
of the pond, those poor mistreated fish!

Hilary’s best friends Mom bought Hilary a prom dress
for a graduation present! They have been in school together
forever and best friends just as long. It was very kind of her,
Amazingly kind really, but some part of me is bothered by it too.
It is a beautiful green dress that looks wonderful with Hil’s red hair.